Often when I have my back to the class and I'm writing something on the whiteboard, there are all sorts of giggles and conversations going on behind me. I guess 99% of them are about their own concerns, but I can't help but feel slightly self-conscious sometimes that there is something stuck to my pants, back or ass. Of course there never is but it made me think about what could be the worst possible thing to have stuck to you, and not know about. I figured it would have to be a recently used condom, either that or a recently used tampon or maxi-pad. God damn, thats just gross!!

You know that dream you have when you're a kid and you're naked at school? Well I guess as we get older and leave school, our dreams are replaced by even more far out shit. I recently had a dream that I was in a meeting, left to go to the toilet, came back and then had to do a presention to my colleages.
As I stood in front of everyone, they all just started freaking out! Then someone from the back called out, "Better put him back in and zip him up before he catches a cold!"
I instantly realised what he meant. I looked down and there was my cock, hanging out, exposed for all to see.
The whole room erupted in laughter.
I woke up in shock and spent the next few days constantly checking my zipper status every few minutes.
Oh the scars it has left me with.. I can still hear them laughing.

Hang on.. that's the telly.